Anyone else wondering why their "summer fun" disposition has shifted? Apparently, this is a very typical occurance in August! For some further insight, please read recent article from our guest author, Maria Sikoutris Di Iorio, whose column appears regularly online in our local TAP (The Alternative Press) websites.
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The month of August comprises a third of the summer season, yet many people find themselves putting it in a different category psychologically than June or July. It is the "Sunday evening" of the summer season, bringing for some people a similar anxiety or sadness to the “Sunday Scaries”. Even if you are decades removed from the school calendar, August may represent the nearing of the end of long, carefree summer days, a slower pace, and a more relaxed lifestyle. This mental shift may happen unconsciously and may have become wired into your brain as a child. If you are a parent, you may find your children experiencing it.
While the calendar itself can’t be changed, there are things you can do to rewire the way you perceive and react to August, and teach your children to do the same:
Mindfulness. You can spend August dreading September, or you can spend it enjoying each remaining day of summer; the key is staying in the moment. Mindfulness is referred to as a practice for a reason: it’s like a muscle, and to be good at staying in the moment, you need to practice and build that muscle. This doesn’t have to mean long meditation sessions – practicing mindfulness can be as simple as slowing down when you eat and consciously drawing your attention to the taste and texture of your food. When you are walking in nature, sitting on the beach, or hanging out by the pool, put your phone away and focus on your five senses; intentionally take note of all of the sights, sounds, smells, textures, and tastes. If you find your thoughts drifting to errand lists, back-to-school worries, or other upcoming stressors, acknowledge the thought and let it go. If your child is expressing worries, acknowledge them, and then gently redirect their thoughts to the present moment – ask them what they are noticing or enjoying, what the sand on their toes feels like, what the ice cream cone tastes like, what the ocean breeze smells like.
Preparation. If the cause of the anxiety is an upcoming change or transition, such as the start of a new school year, being prepared can help alleviate the anxious feelings. For kids, reconnecting with friends who they haven’t seen over the summer, discussing what their schedule and routine might look like when school starts and practicing some portions of it like wake-up and lunch times can be calming. Figuring out what you can control – what to wear on the first day, what to pack for lunch – can also alleviate the anxiety of the unknown. Just make sure to find a balance between planning/preparing and ruminating so that you are not wasting what’s left of the summer preparing for its end.
Things to look forward to. Fight dread with happy anticipation by planning some pleasant or exciting activities in August – as well as in early fall – to look forward to. This might be a long beach weekend, a movie you’ve been looking forward to seeing in the theaters, or a Labor Day weekend party. Kids might enjoy starting to think about their Halloween costumes.
Gratitude. Talk or journal about the highlights of your summer, the things you did and enjoyed, the moments you are grateful for. Make a photo book of your vacation or all your summer memories and in the captions write what you are grateful for from that moment. Expressing gratitude helps release serotonin and dopamine, both of which promote calm and increase happiness.
Note: If you find yourself or your children experiencing frequent or severe sadness or anxiety as the end of the summer approaches, it may be worthwhile to explore the reasons and problem-solve with the help of your doctor or a mental health professional.
By Maria Sikoutris Di Iorio, MA, EdS, MFT, LPC
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